It's Been a Rough Week

It’s been one of the weeks that what could happen have happened. Dealing with these things has taken a lot of my time up, both mentally and physically.  You know when you put your life and your family’s lives in God’s hands, the devil will try everything in his power to bring you down and make you doubt everything you know. That pretty much sums up my week.

I have cried a lot and prayed even more. I have had to go off by myself and just be alone for a short while. I have been shorter tempered than I normally am, I hate feeling like that. I am ashamed that I haven’t held my tongue.   Last night I had a long talk with God, I have asked for forgiveness for not remembering what is most important, for allowing the problems /worries of today affect me so greatly. I know I am human and I make mistakes, believe I make a lot of mistakes, but part of my growth with God is seeing those mistakes and facing them and asking for forgiveness and guidance from him.

After my talk with God I laid my head on my pillow and slept a restful and sound sleep. I try to remember he is here with me at all times. He will help me on the path he has laid before me, I just have to trust in him and allow him to lead me and let go off all the issues that the devil knows he can use to hold me back.

A couple of my favorite quotes:

Yesterday is gone, today is a gift, and tomorrow is mystery.

Our past is forgiven, right now is the beginning and tomorrow is in God’s hands.

 God Bless,

Tammy


I am linked up at: Women Living Well Blog and Time-Warp Wife

Brrrr Wednesday

We had a snow front come through Monday and it left behind cold temperatures! While the snow was beautiful and so much fun to play in, the temperatures made it difficult to stay out for an extended period of time. Still yet my kids had a blast sledding and making snow angels.

I gave the kids a half day of school under the conditions that they would work hard and they did. So they got the rest of the day to enjoy the snow before it's all gone and a muddy mess it left in it's place.

It was the perfect time to make a nice hot dinner. Soup beans and cornbread was on the menu last night. And oh did it every hit the spot. I also made a few batches of chocolate chip and sugar cookies. The oven being on kept the house nice and warm.

I have so many things on my heart and mind that I am praying about. Asking the Lord for guidance and wisdom. Some I will share on here others will be left for the right time. I feel the Lord leading my husband and I down new paths, it's exciting and too be honest a bit scary. I'm a routine person by nature and I like things just so, and everything that has been happening and is going to happen is anything but, but all the same I find a comfort in allowing God to lead us. He is the potter we are the clay!

God Bless,
Tammy

Reflecting on 2011

photo source:tssphoto.com

It's hard to believe that 2011 is almost over and 2012 is about to begin. As I sit and think about 2011 and all that has happened. I find many joys and blessings and a few heart aches along the way. Looking back I can see how God has been there through the good and the bad. He has given me strength when I had no strength left, he gave me wisdom when I was at a loss, he comforted me when I was hurting, he is truly the father I always wanted and so very blessed to have him as my savior, friend, and father.

I have lost my earthly father to a sinful world but gained a son that I adore. I have gone from teaching to homeschooling, a decision I love and have been blessed beyond words for making it. My oldest son Jason graduated and started college, he has completed his first semester and did awesome!

I have learned many lessons and new things. I have learned to let go even when you really don't want too. When my dad left us, it hurt me deeply. I felt I was at a loss and couldn't believe what was happening to us. After trying to give him another chance and getting deeply hurt yet again, I had to come to the realization that I must walk away and let him go, that is exactly what I did. I still pray for his soul but I no longer have any contact with him. I have learned to forgive and not hold onto hurt or bitterness, it is very damaging to our overall body and health and just not worth it.

I have learned to be more soft spoken and kind ,a lesson I would have never been able to achieve without God. The product of this lesson has been remarkable. Our home is lighter and brighter, the feeling is much more comforting and relaxing. I'm not perfect and I still make mistakes but I have learned it's OK to admit your wrong and ask for forgiveness. Showing my children my humility by asking for forgiveness when I'm wrong is showing them the right way to handle themselves when they are in the wrong.

So many things have brought me to where I am today. Some if I had to choose I would have chosen another route but all things happen for the good of those that love the Lord. And through my trials in the valley and my cheers on the mountain tops God has been there each step. I called out to him in my pain and he carried me, I cried out to him in joy and praised with me.

I step into 2012 with eager anticipation to see what God has in store for our family! He is the driver and we are his passengers!

God Bless,

Tammy

I am now a HOMESCHOOLING MOMMA

photo source photobucket

I have been praying about this decision for over a year,but have felt the nudge to move forward with it for many years. But out of fear I doubted myself.

I love the school that I teach in and my daughter goes to. It's a faith built Apostolic one God school. But with that said since my nephew/son has moved in and I have been conducting summer school here at home. I have found that he is terribly behind in many areas.

The public school that he attended since pre-k has sadly pushed him along each year and each year he has become increasingly behind. Then they wondered why he was easily frustrated and restless. He was not catching on. I was very surprised when I found out they actually passed him to move onto the 3rd grade. When he can barely read at the first grade level,his math skills are very low and more. The good thing and I thank Jesus for this is that he is catching on. I am taking things very slow with him and he is responding.

He gets down on himself sometimes when he sees my daughter excel so quickly at her tasks. I just reassure him that she has had more one on one and private school education but that he will get better,he only needs to believe in himself and work hard. I know I'm going to.

I am so excited I feel like I have finally made the right decision. I have a peace in my heart that I have not had before. My husband is 100% backing me up and my oldest son even wants to help teach Spanish. I know there will be pumps in the road but as long as we keep Jesus as the center of our lives in all areas he will give us the strength and wisdom to continue on.

God Bless,

Tammy



Oh my goodness it's been that long.....

Wow,I didn't realize I haven't updated my blog since August LOL. I have been so busy. I was working at our Christian school,Apostolic Christian Academy,between that and taking care of things at home I had very little time to work on my blog.

Now that summer is here I can update you with a few things that have been going around here.

First off my little girl Carissa has the Holy Ghost! It was an awesome evening. She recieved this wonderful gift in October. I cried like a baby when she recieved it. That meant my whole family now had the Holy Ghost. I was beaming with pridea and felt so blessed I was overwhelmed.

Here is a picture someone took for me,while I was praying with her. It's not the best quality because it was taken from a cell phone but I believe it caught the power of the mement just fine.

Remember I said that meant that my whole family had the Holy Ghost,well little did I know how things would change. When you put your life in God's hands and put him in charge you never know where he will take you and how blessed your life can be because of it.

My nephew that I refer to as my son,is living with us. We are raising him. He is 8 years old and full of love and joy.

He is a blessing to our family and is absolutely tickeled to be a part of our household. He is full of questions and is eager to learn. I love teaching him and he just obsorbes as much information as he can.

I have been praying about something for a long while now. And the Lord has given me my answer. I will talk about that more at a later time though.

This brings me to our oldest son Jason's high school graduation. I still can't believe that he is old enough to graduate. In the weeks before his graduation my mind was flooded with memories,all the little things that we don't think much about at the time and many of the monumental things as well.

The night of his graduation I was emotional of course. I cried and smiled at the same time. Now he is going onto his next phase of life,college. He has been accepted in a university around here and starts in August.

Time really does fly. We are so proud of him and know he is going to do great in the future.

Well that's all the time I have for now.

God Bless,
Tammy

Fall Cleaning

With Summer soon coming to an end and fall beginning I start to focus on getting things done  to prepare for the cooler temperatures.


I first go through the house and make a list of things I want to focus on that I may not otherwise. From there I make my way outside and walk all along my property. I make a detailed list of things I want to take care of inside and out of my home.

Things I look for are..... do the carpets need to be cleaned,do the drapes need cleaned,is there anything that needs to be painted or repaired before it gets to cold out to do so,wash the patio furniture and wash cushions to later put away,make sure the gutters are clean,is there any weeding or trimming that need to be done,does the siding need to be washed down. These are all things I look at as well as anything else I may see that needs some attention and add it to my list.


I work on my list until it's complete or at least that's the plan. I also enlist my whole family to work on it. We work together as a family to complete the list. In a short time our home is ready for the new season.


Tammy

I'm Back!

Good Thursday Everyone! I am finally back,I'm still praying about everything that has happened in my life lately but the Lord has instilled strength and some joy that would have never been possible if not for him. My mother is doing better,she still have some bad days but they are less than before. The Lord has strengthened her as well and she has a renewed faith that brings a smile to my heart. To see her talk about the future and moving on oh my that is like sweet music to my ears. She knows that she would not be where she is right now if it wasn't for the Lord! What an awesome God we serve! He hears me when I praise his name and loves me enough to sit beside me when I'm crying,what more could a girl ask for.

No my dad is still not talking to me nor will he even look at me. As a matter of fact he runs from me. That hurt me terribly but I know it has nothing to do with me personally,he has issues of his own. The devil has hold of him,I continue to pray for his soul and will not stop. I still love him and I'm trying very hard to let go of the anger I have toward him but it's hard and I'm human. In time maybe the wounds will not be so devastating but for now I can only do what I can,I'm not super woman.

Church is going so great! God is moving in a mighty mighty way. We are into the busy church season. We had a 3 day revival weekend before last. Brother Mark McCool preached,awesome is the word,the power of the Holy Spirit was powerful! Loved it! We traveled to Hunnington Wv for a youth rally,it was great! I love going to these type of services,to see all the young people there to worship the Lord is well more than words can express! This is the future of our faith and to see the mass numbers of young people earnestly seeking Jesus,filled with the Holy Ghost,I stand in awe of God's mighty power! We will have many of these type of services this summer and we will go to as many as we can.

Jason has been down this week the silly boy went swimming without sun block and now has sun poisoning. Yes he knows the risk  he has taken and how dangerous the sun is,because I have been drilling him about how stupid this was since. He is in a lot of pain and blistered up really bad,he is in steroids for the inflammation and lots of TLC from momma for the pain and itching. Needless to say he will not do this again.

On the home front things are going well. We put a small garden in. I had lots and lots of help. My uncle rototilled it for us,Jason helped me fertilize it and John,Jason and Carissa helped me plant. So you could say it's been a family event. Brandon runs from garden work he hates it. We use to have a large garden each year but since my surgeries and problems from that we haven't had one. I have really missed it,it's relaxing to me to work in it almost therapeutic. I go out to it every morning to see the progress and each morning I am surprised at how fast things are progressing. I love it! I can't wait to be able to pick fresh the things I need to whip up a tasty garden salad!

I am about out of time so until next time,God Bless
The Happy Homemaker

Catching up

I normally don't blog on weekends (God and family time) but since I haven't blogged since Tuesday I thought it would be a good time to send in a post.

I have been so busy this week it's crazy. Since my mom is in the hospital I am taking care of her things as well as mine. Paying her bills,running errands for her and such. And visiting her every chance I get. She is doing much better but it's when she is released and she has to deal with everything once she's home. That will be the hardest part. I have told her I will help as much as I can and if she needs to she can stay with us for a few days. She said OK but I know my mom and she will want to be in her own home,which I don't blame her. She has a lot of things to do at her house,things to go through,etc. I have told her I will gladly help her,hopefully she will accept my offer to help.

The sun has finally made it's way over the hills and it's filling this little valley up with light and warmth! Something much needed after last nights thunderstorms,they brought them a chill to the air. My uncle is coming over today to till our little garden. I can't wait to get started,I enjoy gardening of all kinds to much. I haven't been able to do any gardening since my surgeries and I miss it. My oldest son Jason has offered to help me and I gladly accepted. I am not sure how much I can do but I am eager to find out.

On the home front well I am officially behind in laundry. I think I may be able to hang some out to dry if it's not going to rain any more. The floors all need to be mopped. And I am going to be going through everything in the master bedroom. I am trying to simplify our lives more. And as a part of that getting rid of things we don't need or use. It's just stuff that is taking up precious space in our tiny humble home.

I have been asking the Lord to help me with our budget. John has a great job but he is at the lowest pay in the plant for the next 16 months. Then he gets bumped up to regular pay. But in the mean time we are living off of a lower pay and I'm OK with that. But it's taking some getting use to. I have asked the Lord to help me as I open my mind to new ideas and to give me an understanding of money that I never had. I am good at budgeting but there's always room to improve.

One area I am extremely interested in and have always been and that is in the kitchen. Cooking more and more from scratch and learning  about soaking grains. I would love to get our grocery spending cut by 30 dollars a week. With some learning and determination I think I can do it.

The Happy Homemaker

At my house

Yesterday was a rainy day so no time outside,well I could have made it to the front porch but didn't seem to get there. My oldest son Jason had a bit of a stomach bug,nothing big just a stomach ache,but he did help me. He bathed our dog Princess,she is old and well getting that old dog smell some dogs get,so we have to bath her more often. She hates but it's a necessary evil.

Monday's are always catch up for me since we rest on Sunday,I do minimal work. I usually have tons of laundry to get caught up. To be honest I have still to understand how this happens. I try to make sure all laundry is done Saturday,so with that we should only have the clothes for Saturday and Sunday. But come Monday morning I am bombarded with huge heavy loads and I am in the laundry room all day,or at least it feels that way. When I am able to hang some laundry out to dry I get much more done,but there are times when that is impossible for me.

Monday is the day I deep clean the bathroom (s),so my deep cleaning is fairly fast and thank God it's that way with all the catch up I have.

Carissa is doing so well in school,she is now doing long addition and subtraction and cursive writing. She is so proud of herself when she gets a letter right. Her whole face just lights up! I love it!

I would love to say that my day was so great but I am still dealing with an extraordinary about of pain. A little history,you all know that I have had 2 spinal surgeries last year. And my awesome out of this world Jesus healed me of scar tissue that was wrapped (ing) around my spine and the muscles,tissue,and nerves in my back. I couldn't move without severe pain that would make me scream out.

I am so grateful my Lord healed me of something the doctors could do nothing but treat the symptoms of. He is so awesome like that!!! I was so happy to be able to rejoice and praise and dance for the Lord like I was never able to before. I felt so free to worship him without the pain I had before!

Then all of a sudden the muscles in between my shoulder blades started to spasm without warning or cause. I was still seeing the pain specialist,it was suppose to be my last appointment with him because I was healed. I told him what was going on and he put me on strong muscle relaxers and some pain medication. He put me in outpatient and did some target injections directly into the knotted up muscles. That worked great for about 8 hours then I felt them spasming again.

Since then the spasms have gotten worse,they are in my neck,shoulders and the muscles that lay on top of my ribs (those are extremely painful). Most of my days are spent sitting in our recliner with a large heating pad set on the highest setting on my back and still it's severely painful. I do still clean my house as I refuse to be defeated by this. I know the Lord can and will heal me in his time. There has to be a reason I am going through this,maybe it's the reach someone to witness to that I would otherwise not be able to reach, I don't know but he knows. The pain was so bad yesterday evening that it actually made my spine hurt,it took all I had in me not to pull my hair out. We are in limbo right now as my husband's benefits don't kick in until June 23,talk about a long wait when your in severe pain on a daily basis. I'm not asking for pity I know I will be healed one day. I just get so tired of living this way. I get weak sometimes,especially in the evenings like last night,then I look back at how far God has brought me and I know he still has me in his hands I just need to trust in him and I will make it through this.





The Happy Homemaker

photo supplied by chantelleiia_x on http://www.photobucket.com/

It's Friday!

The above picture was taken out of our picture window in our living room. We thought this was the prettiest little bird and it kept coming by to visit with us most every day. Even though it had secret motives,he was stealing cat food from the cats bowl on the porch. : ) I wish I would have thought to snap one of  it stealing the cat food. lol

I woke up this morning so disappointed. I started some buttermilk yesterday just like I have countless times before and it didn't turn out right.It was not thick and smooth like it normally is it had chunked up like milk does when it spoils. I can't think of anything that I did different except I used 2 % milk when I usually use Whole milk. I honestly didn't think that would make that much of a difference but I suppose I was wrong. Now I have to wait until I go to the store next week to get some more whole milk. : (

I have gotten away from so many of the things that I firmly believe in. I really didn't mean to,I suppose it was because I have been dealing with so much with my parents getting a divorce after 37 years,it has really hurt in ways I never thought it would. I haven't baked in what seems like ages,I feel like I have been going through the motions of keeping home but not feeling the fullfillment I usually do. Even my oldest son Jason told me he could tell I was sad. Yes I am I am grieving the loss of a once happy marriage and the fall of a good Christian man. I am not depressed but I am mourning and will mourn for some time to come. But I am starting to want to do a lot of the things I use to do. Like..... make my cleaning products,bake bread,quick breads,deserts,keep my home as clean and clutter free as I can. Teach my daughter how to keep a home,I was before all this doing Helpmeet lessons with her. Little things because she is still young but it's still important to start teaching young so they see the importance of our role in the family. She has learned how to sort laundry,load it in the washer,put the detergent in and start it. She has learned how to unload the dishwasher and put away the dishes as well as load them. She has learned how to clean the bathroom and make her bed properly. She was learning how to do some cooking,little things like she helped me make biscuits for dinners,she would stir something in the pot,she would knead bread for me and she helped me cook by adding ingredients for me. Then when all this happened it crushed me so badly I dropped it all and I'm ashamed to admit that but it's true. The good thing is that I see all I have lapsed in and felt the urge to pick it all up again and begin my life as it has been. God is so good to us when we are down he is there to comfort us and when he knows we need to push to get up again he does that. I am so greatful to have a father that loves me that much.

The plan for today is to cut up 1 - 2 cups of leftover turkey from last nights dinner and use it in the turkey n gravy for tonight. The rest I will slice up thin for sandwiches.I made up a delicious broth for the gravy using the turky carcass and herbs. I would like to make some cookies to it's been a while since I have done that,it would be nice to fill the house with the aroma of sweet yummy chewy homemade cookies. Brandon my youngest son wants me to make a pumpkin pie. Also I have laundry,I try to make sure all my laundry is washed up,Sunday is God's day and work is not a part of it. The cars need cleaned and the laundry room needs a good wipping down. Friday cleaning normally doesn't take that long so it frees up more time for special things like baking or a craft project or just some fun family time. Then later tonight we are attending a 2 day seminar at our church called Soul Winning, preached by Brother Sutton,I have never had the pleasure to hear him preach and I'm really looking forward to it.

I hope you have a wonderful weekend whereever you may be. May God bless you and your family.

Until Monday,

The Happy Homemaker

From sun to rain!

The day started out so nice and warm and ended up with a nice little thunderstorm that has cooled things down. It's rather chilly out now and still raining,I know we need the rain but boy do I love sunny days. There's just something about a sunny day that makes you feel better.

Tonight it's just 3 for dinner,my sons are staying over a friends houses. And on all nights when I'm making a big dinner,that's my luck. LOL

The day has gone by pretty slow pace,nothing really happening. I am still doing laundry because my oldest Jason had kitchen duty last night and forgot to run the dishwasher. So I had to run it this morning putting me behind all day. I hate when that happens. But all in all it was a rather relaxing day.

I am starting to get use to John being back to work and working night shift. I have the kids all organized on what they can and cannot do while daddy is sleeping. It's when it's almost time for him to get up I get all anxious only because I miss him so much and can't wait to spend some time with him. We are blessed that God brought him where he is right now but when your use to your best friend being right there and then he's not you really do miss him at least I do.

Every morning we read as a family the proverb that corresponds with the day of the month,today we ready chapter 8. We discuss it and then we start our day with prayer. I find it helps my whole day go better when I put Jesus first I start on the right foot so to speak. If something happens and I can't don't get to pray in the morning and read the bible I feel off all day long.

Well enough of my rambling I have to and finish dinner.

The Happy Homemaker

At my house

The above picture is of our Siberian Husky KiKi I took during the blizzard,she loves the snow

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas. Did you over do it this year eating to many cookies,cakes and pies. LOL That's a yummy part of the Christmas season. : )

We have been dealing one after another snow and ice and cold. It has been a doozy of a winter already. If the first week of winter is to be a sign to the rest of the winter it's going to be a bad one.

Today I am trying to get the house in order again. I made lists for the kids and they are busy working to get their chores completed. I have my list ready and have been working and marking off as I go. We have the tree down and just need to finish putting the decorations down and put them away. I am going to have John help me rearrange our living room. One of the side effect of my disability I can't do any moving or lifting of well much of anything,it's frustrating but that's the hand I have been dealt.

I am going to make cheese burgers with all the fixings for lunch today and make steak hoggies for dinner. The boys are looking forward to eating today. LOL Just like males huh,they do best with a full tummy.

Well I am now out of time,God Bless.

Happy Homemaking